Feeling Blue

     Considering I haven't gotten any comments on my blog in almost 4 months I'm gonna assume that nobody I know reads my Blog.  Which is fine because I'm gonna actually rant on here for the first time since I first started writing on here about my Likes and Comedy Club Experiances.  I had a few girl problems earlier this year and since I stopped trying I've felt a lot happier.  I've had the habit of Isolating myself from everyone in the past and this year I've tried being a lot more social but lately its gotten really difficult. 
     I tried to get a bunch of people to go with me to the comedy club.  I've now been 7 times.  The first time I went with my friend Travis from work,  the second time I went with my cousin Caleb and last time I went for my birthday with my friend Eve but that's it.  I can rarely get anyone to go with me and even thought I always have fun its a little frustrating because I'm trying to get people to hang out with me but they can't or won't.  My childhood friends Steve and Matt have families, Travis's wife doesn't let him do anything,  my friend Matt from work is always busy with his wife and kid, I can't even get Eric or my friend Noah to return a text and Eve has a boyfriend who does seem to be pretty cool.  And Eve, if your actually reading this, I value your friendship more than you will ever know, and really appreciate the time that you've spent hanging out with me and the time I've spent bothering you at work this past couple of weeks.  I'm always happy to just be around you especially since you seem to be the only one who actually wants to be a part of my life.  I don't know where I would be if it wasn't for you.  And even though it was hard at first,  Becoming your friend is one of the best decisions that I've ever made
    I usually feel appreciated at work.   There are people who are always willing to say Hi to me.  I'll talk to Travis, Curt, Katie, Eric and Eve if I see them. I can always count on Matt to come hang out with me if we have break or Lunch at the same time too.  When I'm not at work its not uncommon for me to feel Lonely.  Weeks will go by and I won't recieve one single call from anybody I know except for maybe my Mom because I try to talk to her at least once a week.  I can feel very depressed at times.  Once In a Great While I just feel like crying but for some reason I just can't bring myself to do so.  I know that I would feel somekind of relief if I could just muster up some tears but can't seem to do that either.
     Don't even get me started on girls,  they've always been a problem for me because I've always been shy and I'm not able to start conversations with them most of the time.   I couldn't tell you the last time that I even had a girl walk up to me let alone talk to me.  There is this cashier at work named Anne who I like but I never have the time to talk to her for more than a minute or two at a time.  She seems to keep herself Isolated and Our schedules just don't elapse enough for me to actually try to have a conversation with her.   I'm really hoping that one of these days soon that that will change.
   Somehow I seem to be getting visitors from people I don't know, so if this isn't your first time reading my blog, feel free to leave me a comment, I would really appreciate the feedback.